I found Jesus!

Many have asked me what lead to my decision to follow the Jesus of the Bible. Here I will touch on some of the reasons. If you would like more information or to talk more about what lead me to my decision feel free to contact me.

It was a sleepless night after our come to Jesus fire. I felt really confused. We had decided to go to a Christian church the next day and I was hoping maybe that could give me more direction. As the night went on my mind was going in all different directions. Mostly a lot of what ifs….

Going to the Christian church wasn’t the first time I had gone to another faiths services but it was for Trevor. I felt comforted that I knew most the music as I’d been raised listening to a lot of Christian artists. I can’t tell you exactly what the message was that first sunday but I remember thinking that I couldn’t believe it all came back to Jesus. After services I decided I really needed to figure out where my heart was. I already felt like I didn’t belong in the Mormon church because I didn’t believe in a God who was once a man, I’ve always believed in one eternal God. Yeah I’m not sure how I missed that part of the teachings for so long. I definitely caught the part about us becoming gods if we were worthy. I understand how the logic makes sense but it didn’t sit well with me.

That very Sunday afternoon I started researching for truth. I needed to know what was true. I first felt the need to compare the Bible to the Book of Mormon. Where they both true? Could they hold up to questioning? One of the resources I used was Bible vs Book of Mormon. After watching that I followed through with researching things online. I was looking for archeological evidence to support each book, what I found was a lot of holes in the Book of Mormon but plenty of evidence for the Bible.

Then I felt that looking into Joseph Smith Jr, the first latter-day prophet of the Mormon church, would be the next place to research. If he were a prophet of God then perhaps I could over look the holes I found in the Book of Mormon. The bible says this about a prophet of God.

Deuteromony 18: 21-22 (KJV)

21 And if thou say in thine heart, How shall we know the word which the Lord hath not spoken?

22 When a prophet speaketh in the name of the Lord, if the thing follow not, nor come to pass, that is the thing which the Lord hath not spoken, but the prophet hath spoken it presumptuously: thou shalt not be afraid of him.

As I started looking into Joseph Smiths revelations I was finding many that were not fulfilled. Perhaps you could reason some of them away but not all of them. Here is just one example.

D&C 114:1

1 Verily thus saith the Lord: It is wisdom in my servant David W. Patten, that he settle up all his business as soon as he possibly can, and make a disposition of his merchandise, that he may perform a mission unto me next spring, in company with others, even twelve including himself, to testify of my name and bear glad tidings unto all the world.

Patten died during the Crooked River Battle that fall. This is just one of many. If you want to look into that more a good start is Jesus Christ vs Joseph Smith.

I continued to look into Joseph Smith. I went right to lds.org and searched for the essays that addresses 11 topics that members have a hard time understanding. (I’ve gone ahead and linked you to them because they are very difficult to unbury on the website). I went right to the first vision. Until I looked it up I didn’t even know there were multiple versions of the first vision. The first record of the first vision was written in 1832 and states that he saw the Lord in a pilar of light. Just one God not two different people. It also doesn’t mention any dark forces.

The second version was written in 1835. It says he heard footsteps behind him. Then a pillar of fire descended upon him with one personage and then a moment later a second personage.

The next account recorded in 1838 is the most commonly known account and the one that can be found in the Mormon scriptures. It says he was seized by some power that completely overcame him so he could not speak. Then crying to the Lord two personages appeared to him in a pillar of light as bright as noon day sun.

All of this left me to really question the first vision. If the first vision really happened it left me to wonder why he would have left out one personage for some audiences and not others? As well as why didn’t he mention the dark power that overcame him in the first few written versions?

At this point I was starting to see so many things that were not adding up for me in the Mormon faith. But my heart was fighting it and wanting to hold onto what was so familiar and what I’d poured my heart into for my whole life. I wasn’t ready yet to give up on it, so I dug deeper.

Moving on from Joseph Smith I started to look at basic teaching between what the Bible teaches and what the Book of Mormon teaches. The Book of Mormon says we are saved by grace after all we can do.

2 Nephi 25:23

23 For we labor diligently to write, to persuade our children, and also our brethren, to believe in Christ, and to be reconciled to God; for we know that it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do.

The Bible says that grace is a free gift that we cannot earn so that no man can boast.

Ephesians 2:8-9 (KJV)

8 For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:

9 Not of works, lest any man should boast.

The Bible makes it clear that I can’t do anything to save myself with my works or earn my way to heaven, yet that is what I thought I was doing as a Mormon. It was only after all I could do then would grace kick in. I was left worrying if I were doing enough. Were we really going to be an eternal family?

Next I shifted my studies to temples. My main purpose being were they really from God.

Matthew 27:50-54 (KJV)

50 Jesus, when he had cried again with a loud voice, yielded up the ghost.

51 And, behold, the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom; and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent;

52 And the graves were opened; and many bodies of the saints which slept arose,

53 And came out of the graves after his resurrection, and went into the holy city, and appeared unto many.

54 Now when the centurion, and they that were with him, watching Jesus, saw the earthquake, and those things that were done, they feared greatly, saying, Truly this was the Son of God.

This was such a powerful scripture to me When Jesus died on the cross the temple veil tore. It tore! So why did we hang it back up? I decided to look at what else the Bible had to say about temples.

Acts 7: 48-48 (KJV)

48 Howbeit the most High dwelleth not in temples made with hands; as saith the prophet,

49 Heaven is my throne, and earth is my footstool: what house will ye build me? saith the Lord: or what is the place of my rest?

God does not dwell in temples made by hands. And again it says it in Acts 17: 24-25 (KJV)

24 God that made the world and all things therein, seeing that he is Lord of heaven and earth, dwelleth not in temples made with hands;

25 Neither is worshipped with men’s hands, as though he needed any thing, seeing he giveth to all life, and breath, and all things;

It was becoming clear to me that if I want to find the Lord it wasn’t going to be in the temple. I was going to have to search for Him somewhere else.

As I was doing all of this research on my own Trevor and I were reading Lynn Wilder’s book “Unveiling Grace“. This book was so eye opening to me and God used it to transform my heart. It was such a turning point in my journey of seeking for truth and to find God. I would recommend it to anyone who has found holes in the Mormon faith as I had.

At this point my heart was being led to the Jesus of the Bible. Part of me was so scared to make that leap of faith because Mormonism is more than a religion, its a culture here in Utah. So I needed more reassurance I was absolutely doing the right thing. I turned to Mormon scriptures. As I studied from their quad I found many contradictions within their own scriptures.

At this point I had enough knowledge to make my decision. It was then I had to focus on my relationship with God. By doing this I could focus on the truth. I turned to the New Testament and started to see the Bible in a new light. One where it made sense and the Gospel was all laid out in what Jesus taught. That you are saved by Him alone, through His grace. That He is enough! It was as I focused on Jesus the burden of never being sure I was good enough started to fall away and I began to feel this feeling of freedom I heard so many former-mormon Christians speak of. Like in the lyrics of Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone) by Chris Tomlin.

My chains are gone
I’ve been set free
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
And like a flood His mercy reigns
Unending love, amazing grace

I can now say for myself my chains are gone, Jesus set me free, because of His amazing grace and I will sing that from the rooftops for the rest of my days.